…and that its oke.

when you have a close friend with whom you do everything 

and with whom you share everything 

you become shockingly close

but when one of you gets a boyfriend

there is a transition

to her doing everything with him

and sharing everything with him

she cant do both at the same time

keeping things just between the two of us or now between the two of them is

the essence of intimacy

of closeness

if she shares “everything” with me then she’s sharing some of his “everything” with me

so thats why there must be a natural transition

the hard part is not accepting that she wont be sharing with me anymore

i understand that they are a team now

its that i have no one else to share with

no one quite like her anyway

and dont misread this is NOT jealously

i dont need a boyfriend or anything

and i have great friends

im just in need of a replacement

i just dont have much hope of finding one who makes as great a team as we did

i miss her, but she’s happy

she’ll miss me too… eventually